To some degree, “[My mother] does not feel she should be pressured into providing money” is really all the letter writer needs to say. "Hopefully we've done a good-enough job for our daughter not to express disappointment with the amount we offer to help with, but I'm sure she would try to negotiate a higher 'allowance' if she thought the amount we were offering was not quite enough. Her email address is firstname.lastname@example.org. A place for women redditors aged 30 and over to discuss questions in a loosely moderated setting.
If you're old enough to get married, you're old enough to pay for it yourself.
However, my mom did make me a tea-length satin dress as her gift.
Stick to what you can afford. They thought that paying for my education was more important and that marriage was much less important.
", As I told Chris, I always follow the principle of TTT, which stands for "tell the truth. It wouldn't have occurred to me to ask my parents to pony up. But I’ve just recovered from a debilitating illness while taking care of my mother until her death. © Gannett Co., Inc. 2020.
My father, who is nearly as well off as my Mom, contributed nothing. Now this father dreads the coming conversation about he and his wife's contribution to the cost of the nuptials. Choose the plan that's right for you. Thoughts? In the past, she has lent him large sums of money, which he struggles to repay. Every family is different, and there are cultural and regional issues that come into play too.
Normally, I would host or pay for it. My mother does not support gay marriage. Parents never have a responsibility to pay for their daughter's wedding whether she's 18 or 80. 25? I was focussed on marriage, not a wedding nor a party. There was a letter on Ask Amy where this 44-year-old woman was about to have her first marriage, and she said, "I feel like it would be nice if my dad helped out with the cost..." and while I'm not totally on board with this woman's reasoning, it got me thinking about parents paying in general. We would like to help, but this is all we can afford.". I think there isn't a one size fits all answer here.
", Once the engagement is official, say something like, "Honey we are excited that you're getting married.
Original content available for non-commercial use under a Creative Commons license, except where noted. I don't think parents are under any obligation to pay for a child's wedding no matter the age of the child, and no matter the parents' financial status. Nobody is entitled to that, except I suppose perhaps a member of the royal family. The survey found that December is the preferred month for proposals. WASHINGTON — Here's a mantra to live by: Do what you can afford. About $700, but it was very nice of him.).
And that the bride’s family is supposed to buy the groom his wedding ring? College launched me into adulthood the same way that paying for a wedding used to be the way for parents to do that-- it's the last big expense to get you set up to start your own life. I'll say that my parents paid for a lot of stuff at my brother's wedding, and they gave them the down payment for their house. My parents chipped in some money (two very distant relatives that my mom knew), his parents chipped in more than my parents (because they wanted like 8 people that we didn't know).
I don't think parents should pay for weddings.
We went to dinner. Christmas Day is the most popular day of the year for couples to get engaged, followed by Valentine's Day and Christmas Eve. It's a big mistake to rob your retirement or accumulate debt for a one-day event. Every family is different so there's no right answer. A traditional wedding for me would have very different costs than a traditional wedding for my cousin who lives a 20 hour drive away, and the cost of an average wedding vs our parents' income is also different-- their typical receptions are smaller and shorter and cheaper, but their parents' income is higher, etc.
If they're on earth to see it, they will want to foot the bill for the whole thing.
A wedding is a big deal, but the party associated with it shouldn't break your bank. Comments and questions are welcome, but due to the volume of mail, personal responses may not be possible. Why on earth would this poor mother even assume it was her responsibility to pay for, host, or otherwise do anything but attend her 40-year-old daughter’s birthday party? Such was the issue for a father who wrote me with concerns about paying for his daughter's wedding. This is such an old fashioned idea.
The WeddingWire survey, based on responses from nearly 18,000 newlyweds married in 2017, found that the majority of parents use savings to help pay for their children's weddings. Last year, the average cost of a wedding …
Edit: Well, I guess parents paying for weddings is less common than I thought.
The groom's parents traditionally pay for a rehearsal dinner.